It seems the answer is Brian Warner's magic-wormhole. You're gonna see lots of file transfer sites with wormhole in their name, but if you want security you should use the original one, which is BW's m-w.
It is implemented in Python [1], so it's hard to install.
So someone made a Go version of it [2] that has binaries for windows, Mac, Linux, BSD etc. But it's command line so maybe not suitable for lay people.
So another person made a GUI for it that also has binaries for all OS [3].
Also there is an android app [4]. Someone needs to implement an iOS one.
Edit: Another is you need to manually enable the checkmark to 'encrypt file names'. Otherwise all file names are in the clear.